Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Path: mit-eddie!mintaka!chaos.cs.brandeis.edu!adam
From: adam@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu (David C. Kaplowitz)
Subject: Re: Soul food for some, bitter crumbs for others
In-Reply-To: usenet@cps3xx.UUCP's message of 23 Feb 90 18:45:44 GMT
Message-ID: <1990Feb24.174004.24666@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu>
Organization: Brandeis University Computer Science Dept
References: <7615@sdcc6.ucsd.edu> <90053.004717EMD101@psuvm.psu.edu> <6577@cps3xx.UUCP>
Date: Sat, 24 Feb 90 17:40:04 GMT
Lines: 14


>>She sets the pot on a table, and continues talking as she sorts the pizzas
>>according to their correspondences to the Russian SSRs.
>>...

>"I'll have the Armenia, hold the Georgia ..."

Any Sushi Pizza left?

ObW: The Wizzard Of Speed And Time
(Obligatory Watching)
Traveler In Elephants
Dave
-- 
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Path: mit-eddie!mintaka!chaos.cs.brandeis.edu!adam
From: adam@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu (David C. Kaplowitz)
Subject: Re: Spring
In-Reply-To: nlp@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU's message of 23 Feb 90 21:15:02 GMT
Message-ID: <1990Feb24.174747.25205@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu>
Organization: Brandeis University Computer Science Dept
References: <220@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU>
Distribution: alt
Date: Sat, 24 Feb 90 17:47:47 GMT
Lines: 22


>Well, it's Spring--62 degrees outside, and our neighbor's sheep are
>gamboling in the fields, despite some recent tough Pennsylvania
>anti-gamboling legislation...
The slightly rotund (much swivle spread) gent with all of the (now
empty) bushmills cups infront of him (and the habbit of talking in
parenthesies (and diverging rapidly from the subject (which reminds
me ... ) what? Oh.  I was saying ... )) Stands, somewhat unsteadly,
with a half grin on his face and starts with ...
"Spring? Lucky you, us bostonites just got several feet of snow.

Oh, and by the way, don't you thing your neighbor is fleecing the new
law some? (what it isn't punday? Oh well.)"

Then with a slightly sheepish look on his face sinks down, hoping that
nobody will notice the shear effrontry of his pun and do anything
about it befor he can lamb out of here to go and earn some more
singles ... 

Traveler In Elephants
Dave
-- 
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Path: mit-eddie!mintaka!chaos.cs.brandeis.edu!adam
From: adam@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu (David C. Kaplowitz)
Subject: Re: boskone (a rather odd story...)
In-Reply-To: cphoenix@csli.Stanford.EDU's message of 24 Feb 90 08:40:50 GMT
Message-ID: <1990Feb24.181601.26227@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu>
Organization: Brandeis University Computer Science Dept
References: <882@dftsrv.gsfc.nasa.gov> <1990Feb14.144245.7620@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu> <503@sixhub.UUCP> <PAS.90Feb16034422@saffron.lcs.mit.edu> <12411@csli.Stanford.EDU>
Date: Sat, 24 Feb 90 18:16:01 GMT
Lines: 25

As the Firetail (affectionate name passed on ... long story) comments,
>Listen up, everyone!  I'd like to make an announcement, ...

"Here, Here!  The only con I am ever talking on again is the way I got
'conned' into this wonderful enviornment (Thank you gilly <*kiss*>)
and want to go marching into the mist (boy I must have missed
something there ... ) and spray of this marvelous company.  Hey Mike,
how can I get a round around to everyone around?  This N-cornered room
is giving me headaches in visualization, and the rafters are a bit
smoky (I can't see _exactly_ who (or what? no definitly who) is up
there now ... )  so could you give me a hand?  Thanks, now how about
helping me (as I put down the rubber hand he just tossed me) get these
arou ... passed ou.. distributed.

Taldin, I didn't know you had a grove out back, can we just go out and
visit, or must we touch the unicorn's horn and sober up first (ObR:
Zelazny something about a black unicorn and chess).  And would someone
introduce me to the "drooling wolf" with the lovely pelt?  My neighbor
just got a new dog that is an Irish Wolfhound, and my other neighbor's
Peek just dissapeared ... I might need protection."

Now where did I put that .sig?
Traveler In Elephants
Dave
-- 
Path: mit-eddie!snorkelwacker!think!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!swrinde!emory!hubcap!dkarres
From: dkarres@hubcap.clemson.edu (Dean Karres)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Spring
Keywords: ecce
Message-ID: <8144@hubcap.clemson.edu>
Date: 24 Feb 90 21:35:50 GMT
References: <220@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU>
Distribution: alt
Organization: Clemson University, Clemson, SC
Lines: 22

nlp@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU (Nick Pine) writes:

>Well, it's Spring--62 degrees outside, and our neighbor's sheep are
>gamboling in the fields, despite some recent tough Pennsylvania
>anti-gamboling legislation...
>--Nick

Ewe had to go and dew it, hay? A little warm weather and a man's mind
turns to thoughts of fantasy I suppose. I shouldn't wool-gather
though. Thinking of spring and frolicing animals (of all species and
gender) be-hooves me to put forth this toast...

To Spring. A time of rebirth. When kidds and old goats alike enjoy the
sun and it grand glare.

dean...k...

-- 
                           || 
dean...k...                || "...With tremblin' hands he gave his gold to the
                           || wild colonial boy..." from John Doolan
dkarres@hubcap.clemson.edu || 
Path: mit-eddie!snorkelwacker!think!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!rpi!ash
From: ash@pawl.rpi.edu (Arthur Hyun)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Love, and Lifelong Soulmates
Message-ID: <25^#%&*@rpi.edu>
Date: 25 Feb 90 00:54:39 GMT
References: <|-!#5^|@rpi.edu> <9060029@hpfcso.HP.COM> <2829@unisoft.UUCP>
Organization: Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, Troy NY
Lines: 73

greywolf@unisoft.UUCP (The Grey Wolf) writes:

>In article <9060029@hpfcso.HP.COM> daq@hpfcso.HP.COM (Doug Quarnstrom) writes:
>>
>>No Taldin, HERE is the cynical view:
>>
>>I will grant, for the sake of argument that soul mates do 
>>exist.  I postulate that my soul mate lives in China.
>>Let us assume that this young lady has some reason to make
>>the long journey to Fort Collins, center of the &*%$#
>>universe.  I am sure that at the very moment our paths
>>are about to cross, one of us will be hit by a bus.
>>
>>There.  I can't let anyone infringe on cynicism, now can I?

>	** WOOF! **

>{ Boyobboy!  We're *really* talking bury-yourself-in-the-sand-because-the-
>  world-sucks-rocks-and-will-never-improve, all-out, down-and-dirty
>  cynicism here!  I thought *I* used to be cynical!!!  Man, you take the
>  f#$(%*g cake!  No, Cynic, your paths will cross.  Your eyes will meet 
>  hers in a brief instant of recognition.  THEN one of you will get hit
>  by a bus.}

EXCUSE me...  that ain't cynicism... that's just down-and-dirty pessimisism.
That's just too random and unhappy to be cynical--where does the "deep mis-
trust in human motives" come in? (thank you Wester's)...

I'm cynical...  I believe that whomever my soulmate is (if she/he/it exists)
will meet me, we'll fall in love, and then she'll tear me to shreads with
random emotional violence, take the kids, take the cash, take the cars (even
if she has to get a friend to do it), take the house and everything else to
totally remove all sense of happiness from my life.  THEN, as she lies on
her deathbed, after seeing some n other males (where n is some sadly large
positive integer) she'll summon me to her side (as i still deeply love her,
and have recognized her for my soulmate) and tell me that she was wrong, that
she never should've let me, and have just figured it out as she lets out her
last breath, thus breaking my heart one last time before she goes.   

*sigh*

i HATE being tantalized.......

>Have a nice day.[*]

>>
>>Cynic
>>
>>
>[*]: Offer void where prohibited
call 1-800-everywhere for a list of prohibited locales around you.

sorry, folks, if you though this had anything REAL to do with soulmates...

                              --Arthur, but only mostly

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
       TO MY DEAREST LOVE
One day, you will look upon your Beautiful husband
    And, you will look upon your Beautiful children
    And, you will look upon your memories
"Once I knew a man
      Sweet and Gentile and Kind
            very much, indeed,
                 like you..."  
    you will say unto your Beautiful husband
Then, you will once again gaze upon your Beautiful husband
      and your Beautiful children
      and your memories will pass.
-- 
----------------------+-----------------------+-------------------------------
    ash@pawl.rpi.edu  |  sammael@mts.rpi.edu  |  the.arthur@rpitsmts.BITNET
----------------------+-----------------------+-------------------------------
Path: mit-eddie!mintaka!yale!cs.utexas.edu!usc!brutus.cs.uiuc.edu!psuvax1!psuvm!jls139
From: JLS139@psuvm.psu.edu (Abaddon)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Spring
Message-ID: <90055.174550JLS139@psuvm.psu.edu>
Date: 24 Feb 90 22:45:50 GMT
References: <220@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU>
 <1990Feb24.174747.25205@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu>
Distribution: alt
Organization: Penn State University
Lines: 20

In article <1990Feb24.174747.25205@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu>,
adam@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu (David C. Kaplowitz) says:
>
>Oh, and by the way, don't you thing your neighbor is fleecing the new
>law some? (what it isn't punday? Oh well.)"
>
>Then with a slightly sheepish look on his face sinks down, hoping that
>nobody will notice the shear effrontry of his pun and do anything
>about it befor he can lamb out of here to go and earn some more
>singles ...
>
>Traveler In Elephants
>Dave

   Ack! Ewe ought to be ashamed of yourself. Lampooning sheep isn't
very fair. Before you know it puns will run rampant.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:  Abaddon ...(the watcher)   'Fiery the angels fell...' :
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Path: mit-eddie!snorkelwacker!apple!arc!steve
From: steve@arc.UUCP (Steve Savitzky)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: A Song:  The Mary Ellen Carter
Message-ID: <826@arc.UUCP>
Date: 25 Feb 90 07:09:58 GMT
References: <1990Feb18.230800.10244@granite.cr.bull.com>
Sender: news@arc.UUCP
Distribution: alt
Organization: Advansoft Research Corp, Santa Clara, CA
Lines: 69

In article <1990Feb18.230800.10244@granite.cr.bull.com> mandel@granite.cr.bull.com (Mark Mandel) writes:
>(Silverblack orders a Moosehead... "No, a Moosehead BEER!"... and
>steps up to the chalk line.  His acoustic steel-string guitar is
>hanging around his neck on a strap that looks like a 50-year-old
>handwoven belt from Guatemala.)  
...
>To the memory and living spirit of Stan Rogers!"  (Lobs the mug in a
>high arc and readies his pick.  The glorious ***CRASHHH!!*** gives the
>downbeat, and Silverblack is playing better than he ever has before.
>From somewhere -- perhaps from other members of the Virtual N-tet --
>fiddles, harps, and other instruments join in the intro.  

[my all-time favorite song...]

From somewhere in the distance one hears a guitar and two voices join in,
dopplered up considerably in pitch.  Steve, Colleen, and Snuggles (the
guitar) appear, very late, considerably blue-shifted from having read
an entire week's worth of Callahans at one sitting, and still singing.

"...and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again!

"Hey, Mike; that calls for a toast.  A round on me!"

A large number of glasses hit the fireplace shortly thereafter.

"Yeah, that song's gotten me through a lot.  Challenger, the quake
last October, ... Could've used it this week, too, but I was stuck far
from home with no guitar."

Sensing a story in the offing, a few people cluster nearer as Steve
swaps a dollar for another glass of gin.

"I went to DC this week for the ACM CSC.  On the whole a pretty good
week, except for missing my wife, my kid, my guitar, and decent
coffee.  I'd been invited by Jim Fetzer to join him in the debate on
software verification.  It went off pretty well, with both sides
claiming victory; I figure if we get some of the more fanatical
verificationists to think about what they might be leaving out we'll
have done some good.  Spent most of Wednesday afternoon and evening
thinking of all the things I *should* have said...

"Well, I heard a couple of good talks, had dinner with my aunt, uncle,
and a cousin I hadn't seen for nearly twenty years, went to the Air
and Space museum -- then spent about two hours standing in various
lines in the airport trying to find out what to do about my flight
that was two hours late.  I ended up spending the night in Salt Lake
City at Delta's expense, having missed my connection.

"The funniest part was standing in line at the ticket counter in
Dulles reading the book I'd just bought -- _The Long Dark Tea-Time of
the Soul_ by Douglas Adams.  For those who haven't read it yet, it
starts out with somebody having a terrible time trying to catch an
airplane..."

He reaches into his pouch and pulls out a slightly battered flier, which
he posts on the bulletin board:

       A   W E S T   C O A S T   F I L K   C O N V E N T I O N !
    Consonance: March 2-4, Radisson Hotel, San Jose; Membership $25
    until 2-1-90; Address: Consonance, c/o Wail Songs, Box 29888,
    Oakland, CA 94604; (415)763-6415.

He then retires to a corner, leans back on Colleen's shoulder, and falls
asleep, a victim of jet lag, gin, and weak hotel coffee.
--
\ Steve Savitzky      \ Grand Central Starport  \ REAL hackers use an AXE!
 \ steve@arc.UUCP      \ 343 Leigh Avenue        \ #include<std_disclaimer.h>
  \ arc!steve@apple.COM \ San Jose, CA 95128      \ h:408-294-6492 w:727-3357
   \__________________________________________________________________________
Path: mit-eddie!wuarchive!cs.utexas.edu!uunet!mcsun!ukc!slxsys!olgb1!olapw
From: olapw@olgb1.oliv.co.uk (Tony Walton)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: What is this newsgroup for?
Message-ID: <16626@olgb1.oliv.co.uk>
Date: 22 Feb 90 21:27:51 GMT
Distribution: alt
Organization: British Olivetti Ltd.,AT&T Division, London, England.
Lines: 11

OK, I give up.  alt.callahans appeared, and since it did I've been trying
to work out who, what or where a callahan is.  There was once a Prime
Minister in Britain called Callaghan - I doubt this has anything to do
with anything :-)

Please could somebody tell me why this newsgroup is coming into my modem?
-- 
Tony Walton, AT&T Division, British Olivetti Ltd., Wellington House,
154-160 Upper Richmond Road, London, England SW15 2FN
LONDON, SW15 2FN.  Tel: (+44) 1 789 6699 Telefax: (+44) 1 785 6670 Telex:27258
Uucp : { ukc | mc[whatever]!olnl1 | ihnp4!cuuxb | iconet | olhqma } !olgb1!olapw
Path: mit-eddie!rutgers!cs.utexas.edu!usc!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!rpi!crdgw1!sixhub!davidsen
From: davidsen@sixhub.UUCP (Wm E. Davidsen Jr)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Is anybody back?
Message-ID: <546@sixhub.UUCP>
Date: 26 Feb 90 12:52:19 GMT
Reply-To: davidsen@sixhub.UUCP (bill davidsen)
Distribution: alt
Organization: *IX Public Access UNIX, Schenectady NY
Lines: 16


  The tall man with the beard comes in and looks around the room. It's
pretty empty. "Ginger ale, Mike," he says, "I've had the bug and don't
want to insult my stomach yet."

  "I was hoping to see some of my friends here who went to Arisia, and
find out how things went. The chairman looked pretty harried last
weekend when I saw her, and I was hoping that things went well."

  He wanders over where a few people are still trying to make a bit of
complex harmony work and slides into a chair to listen.
-- 
bill davidsen - davidsen@sixhub.uucp (uunet!crdgw1!sixhub!davidsen)
    sysop *IX BBS and Public Access UNIX
    moderator of comp.binaries.ibm.pc
"Getting old is bad, but it beats the hell out of the alternative" -anon
Path: mit-eddie!rutgers!tut.cis.ohio-state.edu!snorkelwacker!bloom-beacon!bu.edu!bu-cs!bucsf!gilly
From: gilly@bucsf.bu.edu (Gilly Rosenthol)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Spring
Message-ID: <GILLY.90Feb26111816@bucsf.bu.edu>
Date: 26 Feb 90 16:18:16 GMT
References: <220@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU>
	<1990Feb24.174747.25205@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu>
	<90055.174550JLS139@psuvm.psu.edu>
Sender: news@bu.edu.bu.edu
Reply-To: gilly@bucsf.bu.edu (Gilly Rosenthol)
Distribution: alt
Organization: Boston University
Lines: 14
In-reply-to: JLS139@psuvm.psu.edu's message of 24 Feb 90 22:45:50 GMT

In article <90055.174550JLS139@psuvm.psu.edu> JLS139@psuvm.psu.edu (Abaddon) writes:
>Ack! Ewe ought to be ashamed of yourself. Lampooning sheep isn't
>very fair. Before you know it puns will run rampant.

Jeez, wouldn't you know it.  Someone makes one baaad pun, and everyone
flocks to join him.  (Peanuts are thrown, and fall to the lanolin-ium
floor.)

-- 
+--------------------+-------------------------------------------------------+
| Gilly Rosenthol    |"Don't dream it, be it" -The Rocky Horror Picture Show |
| gilly@bucsb.bu.edu |"On ne voit bien qu'avec le coeur.                     |
|		     | L'essentiel est invisible aux yeux." -Le Petit Prince |
+--------------------+-------------------------------------------------------+
